Let me expose the single biggest myth about negotiation by using an analogy....

When explaining how you can improve your negotiation results, it is useful to use a golf analogy. Golf is very similar to negotiation in that it is a great example of something that is complex rather than something that is complicated. Let me explain.

Think of the relatively new Airbus A380........this super jumbo jet is a great example of something that is complicated. It is theoretically possible for you to completely disassemble this awesome piece of machinery or take it apart and for you to put it all back together again in the same way it was before you took it apart. Of course, this will be a tough task as you will be dealing with millions of parts and it will probably take a very long time to complete. Yet, it is theoretically possible to do this because it is something that is linear and sequential.

On the other hand, golf (like negotiation) is a great example of something that is complex. If you were to hit a golf ball and I asked you to hit another ball but to ensure that the 2nd ball ended up in exactly the same spot as the 1st ball.....what do you think will happen? Of course you will know that the odds of that happening is very very slim. This is because the ball might catch a different bounce the 2nd time round, the wind might be blowing from a different direction, your grip might not be exactly the same as it was the 1st time and so on.....there are so many things that influence the potential outcome that it is almost impossible to generate exactly the same results twice in a row.

In a similar way, you could negotiate with someone today in exactly the same way that you negotiated with someone yesterday and you may get a completely different result. You see.......you could do everything right in a negotiation and get a poor outcome or you can do almost nothing right and get an amazing outcome...

Unfortunately there are many, in some cases, quite well known organisations out there that teach people a linear, sequential approach to negotiation that goes something like this:

"Follow our 5,7 or 8 step  approach to negotiation and you will get great results".......... - typically they will start off by saying that you must first present your argument, then ask some questions, then propose some options, then you trade concessions and only then do you try to close a deal.....

But unfortunately negotiating is not like baking a cake. There simply is no such thing as a standard approach to negotiation. This would be like saying that if you play golf, you should hit all your clubs in linear succession. You should start off by always hitting the driver, followed by the 3 wood, followed by the 5 wood, then the 1 iron and so forth....clearly this just doesn't make sense. It is far more useful to consider the lie of the ball, the distance that you have to hit the ball, the wind direction and other factors that may impact the outcome before you select the club that will have the best odds of delivering the desired results.

So much of what has been advocated as negotiation best practice has unfortunately not kept up with the way that the world has globalised and has its origins in a purely mono cultural, anglo saxon environment. A linear approach to negotiation will expose you and your organisation to significant financial and relationship risks, all the more so if you are negotiating in a cross cultural environment or if you are negotiating multiple issues with multiple people that could impact the profitabilty or outcome of the transaction.

Thinking that negotiation is linear and sequential is therefore not only not of any practical use, it is downright irresponsible and dangerous.

It is far more useful to first understand the context within which negotiation will take place, followed by considering all the factors that may have an impact on the outcome and only then to formulate an approach in line with the negotiation process that will enable you to extract the best value from your efforts.

For instance, if you always approached each negotiation in a standard way where you opened up by going into an arguing phase for instance, you would in all likeliness come up short if you were negotiating in the Middle East or parts of Asia where you probably should be spending time during the 1st meeting or negotiation really focusing purely on contextual elements and not presenting any arguments at all......In later meetings you may want to spend all of your time only asking questions, presenting arguments and trading concessions and so forth.

Following a linear approach to negotiation is like going to all of your sales meetings with exactly the same sales pitch regardless of the needs and expectations of your prospects.....or using the same approach to negotiate when buying stationery or when you are negotiating a complex outsourcing agreement. This type of linear approach is guaranteed to generate resistance and resentment and most definitely will not deliver optimal value to anyone.

What you really want is a flexible approach to negotiation that is simple without being simplistic.....